Avoiding Tragedy

by Greg Shepard THE WRONG WAY The follo wing story recently made nation al news : It involved an incid en t with a high school wres tling tea m from the Central Was hi ngt on area . A pparently the re was a n i m osi ty be tween te a m m em b er s w ho we re Mexican-Ame rican and th ose that were w hi te. Four of the Mexican-America n wres tlers held a w hite kid down and shoved a broo mst ick about 12 inches u p and into his rec tu m . Th e hea dl ines sc rea me d ou t p hrases like brutal ga ng rap e with a broom handle and to add fuel to the fire, the parents of the accused were u pset becau se their sons were expelled from school.

H ow in the worl d co u l d somethin g li ke t his happ en? I called a friend w ho coac hed at a neighboring school an d ask ed him abo u t th is incid ent. He ex pressed that the story was blown so mew ha t ou t of proportion but th at it was b as icall y tr ue . Th e b r oom st ick was inserted the full 12 inc hes. Le a d e r ship co u ld ha ve pr evented this fro m hap pening. If I have my facts straigh t, the coach allowed "haz ing". To be a memb er of th e wrestling team, yo u had to go through ini tia tio n o r hazing . Ol d e r team memb ers would m ak e yo u nger team members d o th ings to be o n th e te am .

T he h a z i n g go t o u t of h an d as requ irem ents sp ira led ou t of co ntro l. The coac h a lso had a bi g bull et in b o a rd in th e w res tli ng r o o m . T hose w h o quit th e te am were publicall y degr ad ed on this bulletin board. Appa rently, just calling a boy a "q uitter" was mild. The boy wh o was b ru t a ll y victim ized co ul d no lon ge r stay in sc hoo l a nd h as since tra ns ferred. H e probably felt so trauma tized th at it was just impossible to face his peers and teach ers. All in a ll it was o ne of the sa ddes t days in h igh school spo rts. I hope we can all learn from th is nee dless traged y. No w let' s look at th e "Right Way"

and discuss so me ch a n ges in p hi loso p hy and le ad e rsh ip which would have prevented a lot of heartache and saved a First of all the BFS Jo u rn al has been replet e with w onderful exa m ples of "Right Way" coac hing me tho ds . This jou rna l is no exception especia lly th e "Q uest For Grea tness" seg me n t. H o w p rec io us r el at io n sh ip s ca n be as th ey are developed bet ween coac h and at hlete . I got a call today from Billy all th e way from Missouri. He'd heard about a BFS Cl in ic and came the last hour or so. Billy th ou ght th at I m ight be the clinician b u t it was Jim Brown. An yw a y Billy was all excit ed as he ad d ress ed me as coach.

You see Billy played foo tba ll for me in 1977. He said he was all fired up ab out lifti ng agai n. I asked him abo u t his life. H e was a grou nds kee per a nd m a rr ied w ith three child re n . You co uld tell he s till tr yin g to be the best h e co u ld b e a n d was a g rea t fathe r. Billy than ked me for being his coach and I th anked him. As I re flec t e d on th at ca ll, I realized h o w unimportant som e things are in coac h ing and yet how import ant o the r things beco me w he n yo u look a t life ov er a n ext ended pe riod . I might a lso me ntio n that Billy w as a fo ur th team p laye r so I a m ve ry th an kful th at everyo ne was treat ed as thou gh th ey we re special.

I be lieve we o ug h t to p ro mote br otherhood a nd accep tan ce of diffe ren t cultures and races. Shouldn't we str ive for team unity? Sho uldn' t we as coa ch es teach th is? Coaches are in an extre me ly powerful lead ersh ip positi on . If we use it wi sely, we can help creat e ge nu ine w a rm feelings between Mex ican-A m e rica ns, w hites, bl a ck s e tc. Don 't we ha ve e no ug h h at red a nd ga ng violence in this wo rld? H a zin g crea tes a n a t mosp he re fo r n eg at iv e an d des tructive beha vior and attitudes es pecially w he n race separatio n is en coura g e d . " Rig h t Way "

lea d e rsh ip s ho u ld h a ve the old er at hletes helping the you nger athletes in their new exp eriences with a team. We need big bro the rs who are willing to teach and hel p the new kid s. This fosters team u nity and good feelings that will last a lifetime. I thin k we ca n a ll em pa th ize w ith th e coac h w ho co u ldn ' t sta nd a kid q u itti ng h is p rog ra m. H ow ever, labeling a kid publi call y as a q uitter is not what good lead ers do at th e high schoo l level or any other level. How a bo u t a hug and a n offe r to help the kid a t any time?

I p rom ise with all my hear t that coa che s w ho ta ke thi s latter ap proach w ill have less kids quitti ng, have more kids on the team , have more wins and ha ve life lon g wa rm relat ion ships . I know ma ny of yo u have a test imon y of the Lord as I d o. Ask ing th is qu est ion has helped me many tim es, "W ha t would t he Savior wa n t me t o do in th is s itua tion?" T he n, after s i t ti ng o r knee lin g in qu iet reflection , grea t answers seem to beco me very obvious. coach's job.

Almost the exact same incident occured in Wisconsin. The case is the midst of legal battles. DON'T HATE - GIVE RESPECT DON'T HAZE - GIVE HELP DON'T RIDICULE - GIVE HUGS

From BFS Magazine — Summer 1992. Part of the BFS Magazine Archive (1980–2014).